Don't Know Russell Brand? You Will.

I've only known about Russell for a few months, and I think he's a bloody riot. I'm wagering that within a couple of weeks, you will too.

MTV tapped him for their VMA Awards, scheduled for September 7th. That's a position that the likes of Chris Rock have held, so he's about to achieve a level of stardom that few British TV presenters/radio personalities/comedians could even dream about.

I've heard his show a couple of times and it's like Howard Stern with lot more brains. This guy is extremely clever and quick. He even has a deeper sense of satire than Stern ever did. And unlike Stern, he's just as happy poking fun of himself as the rest of the absurd world.

On his last show, he described what it was like being detained at LAX with a Tibetan monk. I laughed out loud as he told of trying to transmit mental messages to the robed man (who spoke no English): "Your Holiness, you dunt unnastand, these fings [pointing to his many rings], they mean nuffink to me."

Anyway, keep on the lookout for this bloke. He's going to be big (unless he goes to far for America's sensibilities) ... after all on the day after 9/11, he reportedly came to host his MTV show dressed as Ossama bin Laden, so who knows what he's capable of?

In Praise of MPs

It's even trickier to keep track of British politics than British football (see below for some stats from the weekend and Monday). Still, in this political season here in the US, I have to envy the UK and other countries that have parliamentary systems.

I know the Knesset, for example, make Israelis bonkers, as it always seems hopelessly intractable. But this vestige of the British mandate does have one advantage: You don't have to pretend you're something you're not. You may have to form a coalition with some pack of nutters, but you don't have to actually claim that you have the extreme views yourself. In other words, if Barack Obama was running for PM instead of president, he wouldn't have to claim to be in favor drilling for oil. He would just have to join forces with another party that does.

Sometimes it seems like England (and now Scotland and Wales with their own parliaments) has fallen into a two-party system with Labour and Conservative in a deadlock for decades. But I was shocked to learn than the Liberal Democrats routinely get a quarter of the votes. The halls in Westminster are lousy with Lib Dems and they're a great party -- proud to be left of centre. Sure, they'd form a coalition with Labour if push came to shove, but because it's a parliamentary system, they don't have to say they're something they're not.

I heard a great interview with their former leader, Sir Menzies Campbell and he's brilliant. Their current leader is another unabashed liberal, Nick Clegg ... I hear he has a bright future.

They too have a shadow government, just like the Torries. Don't you have to love a system that includes something as cool sounding "shadow government"?

QUICK FOOTBALL RESULTS
Man U won this time, but so did Chelsea and Liverpool again, so they're still on top. Could we be looking at the end of an era with Manchester?

Condolences to my friend, Edward. His lads of Tottenham lost again. They're now ranked 17 out of 20. Then again, there are a lot of weekends between now and championship time.

The New Most Beautiful Words

Henry James might have thought that the most beautiful words in the English language were "summer afternoon," but "See you in 2012 in London" sounded pretty sweet to me.

Now that everyone can quiet down about Beijing, we can focus on the real capital of the world. As if our city on the Thames needed another push, the Olympics will absolutely make London the place to be: An English-speaking capital in the most new most-important region in the world: Europe.

This is going to be fun.

Not My Cuppa Tay

I'll never get over how many different entry points and gateway drugs there are to the Anglophile obsession.

Case in point: On the ride back from Martha's Vineyard last weekend, my brother-in-law told me that he never realized that I was an Anglophile (so many people express shock at this dirty little secret), but that it must run in the family.

He says while they are channel surfing, my sister always stops if the people have British accents.

I never considered my sis much of Anglophile. After all, I think she had only one Who record growing up and no Beatles albums. Kinks? Who are they?

But for her, loving British culture means Hotel Babylon and those Jane Austin stories they've been airing on PBS.

Frankly, those never did much for me. Nor was I much of an Inspector Morse of Upstairs Downstairs fan ... I tended to like the Britcoms mostly, although I did like that show from the late 80s in which Ian McShane played a crime-solving antiques dealer. (Lovejoy had a much nicer vocabulary than McShane's character on Deadwood.)

I guess the lesson is that Anglophilia takes you tastes and makes them more acute. It doesn't transform you into a new person, with new likes and dislikes ... it just sort of directs them. Jerry Lewis fan? Here's Rowan Atkinson. Ramones fan? Meet The Jam.

Peaches Geldorf

I read that the breakfast show, Richard and Judy, is moving off Channel 4. So I searched for them on YouTube.

And tripped on this appearance on their chat show:

Peaches Geldorf?!

So by checking out a show I *had* heard of, I found someone cool I hadn't heard of.

Peaches is Sir Bob's daughter, naturally, and she's quite a celeb -- far less serious than her dad. Here she talks about a special she did about about Islam:

I'm Really Not Obsessed with Doctor Who

It might seem like I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about Doctor Who, but it just isn't so. But having said that, I did just hear a preview of an audiobook that kind of blew my mind.

Who knew? It seems that these audiobook-exclusive stories done by the Beeb are well popular in the UK. Sometimes they get other cast members to narrate, like Freema Agyeman, but in a recent one called Doctor Who: Pest Control, the reader is Doctor number 10 himself, David Tennant.

The really amazing thing is, if you like language as much as I do, that Tennant does all the characters (after the fashion of these British audiobooks) and each one is in a different British accent. The narration is in his voice, which is Scottish. And of course, he does the Doctor himself in his semi-posh accent. And he does a cracking job imitating Donna Noble. Throw in some Irishmen and a Northern accent or two and you've got an encyclopedia of speech patterns.

It'll be hard to find this recording at your local Barnes & Noble, but you can download it from iTunes.

Mr. Bean Goes Portable

The fun of watching the original Mr. Bean series, was being able to see the Buster Keaton of our time in action. If you know Rowan Atkinson from Four Weddings and Funeral or Blackadder, you've seen his hilariously imbecilic side and his hilariously clever side. But what this guy can do with physical comedy is amazing. Here's just a taste from his one-man (Beanless) show:



Usually the cartoon versions of any show are rubbish -- think of that animated Beatles series. But the animated Mr. Bean was actually pretty good.

A year ago, they came out with a Mr. Bean videogame for PlayStation 2. Much to the consternation of the nine-year old in the Phonybrit household, we do not have PS2. Ah, but it has just been announced that a version of the game has been released for the hand-held Nintendo DS. That's something that the nine-year-old does have.

I guess I'm going to have to hit GameStop when she hears about this.

If it's August, it Must be Edinburgh

Every August, the capital of Scotland becomes the center of the English-speaking cultural universe.

The Edinburgh Festival is actually a collection of several festivals that happen simultaneously: Theatre, comedy, books, music ... even an Islamic festival. This year, everyone's talking about the comedy part, which seems to get more and more daring (read insulting) each year.

I've just tripped on a site that helps you experience the whole thing virtually. It's called edfest.tv. Someday, I'm going to take that great train from Kings Cross, over the viaduct that I made such a big deal about in the show I did for National Geographic about bricks, and actually see this thing un-virtually. But in the meantime, this site is a pretty good simulation.

Okay, I Admit It

I tried my hardest and couldn't finish Nick Hornby's ode to footie, Fever Pitch. With my daughter being a developing soccer star, I thought I'd give it a go.

It's just so hard getting dropped in from another planet and trying to sort it all out. I couldn't always work out who Hornby was talking about as he interchanged official names, nicknames, the pitch they play on ... and, of course, all those 1970s players.

Then again, I'd like to see my counterpart make head or tails out of a sentence that no one would bat an eyelash at here, for instance:

Yaz hammered the Amazin's at Fenway.

But this season, I'm really going to try to work out who's who. I might actually stay awake during the sport section of the BBC News Worldservice report. The Premier League started their season on Saturday, so this is as good a time as any to start paying attention.

I'm feeling a little techy from a weekend in (New) England and driving for ages, so here's some highlights. I'm going back to bed:

Chelsea beat Portsmouth and is now in the number one position
Arsenal won -- West Brom went home disappointed
Man U (champs for the last two years) tied with Newcastle
Everton lost to Blackburn
Liverpool over Sunderland
Tottenham lost to Middlesborough
West Ham beat Wigan at WH's home, Boleyn Ground

Captain Scarlet is Back (for Me)

Cablevision is rubbish, unless you count those weird high-definition channels they stick on in the 700 range.

To fill all that programming, they turn to England much of the time. One of my favorite of those channel is called Animania HD. Among the imports there is something you should see.

If you've heard of Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons (I had heard about it from my friend Edward, but had never seen it), you think of it as England's version of the great 1960s marionette show, The Thunderbirds. In fact, Captain Scarlet and the T-birds had virtually the same creative team and borrowed liberally from each other ... or more accurately, the American version borrowed from the British one, if I have my facts straight.

If you've never heard of the Thunderbirds, that was the show that Trey Parker and Matt Stone were having a go at with their Team America: World Police. If you've never heard of any of the above, I just don't know what to say.

Very briefly, the plot has to do with an international security force of the future. They are battling a force called the Mysterons, who have the ability to inhabit human bodies just after killing them, like Invasion of the Body Snatchers. The Mysterons tried the same thing on Captain Scarlet, but were interrupted. Now he's some kind of hybrid: human ethics, but he can't die.

Here comes the cool part. In 2005 Gerry Anderson, the creator of both marionette shows (billed as "Supermarionation") launched a computer-graphics-driven show in "Hypermarionation." The technique combines CGI and motion capture -- and it's brilliant! Very good plots and very beautiful to look at in HD.

For some reason, we weren't getting Animania for a short time in the Phonybrit household. Now it seems to be back. Can't wait to set the DVR.

Oh! And football starts tomorrow in the UK. Arsenal will battle West Brom. Man U, last year's champs, start their season on Sunday.

The Special Relationship Continues

I caught the NPR show "Fresh Air" on the radio on Tuesday -- no timeshifting ... it was actually on the air, which is a rarity for me.

They had on a British "soldier of fortune" who operates in Iraq called John Geddes. While listening to him talk, it really struck me how America and the UK have got on during the last century. While he had some interesting opinions about how the Americans operate (for instance, driving through the country in their shiny SUVs and Humvees bristling with weapons, while the British take mechanically sound vehicles and distress them to blend in) the fact is that for better or for worse (okay, just for worse) it's the Brits and us there.

The special relationship is more than a shared language. As noted here before, they have a different word for everything there, and even different grammar. Canada may be more similar to us culturally, but we're far less tied at the hip on the international scene in my opinion. And Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and other English-speaking countries are just plain exotic.

When the UK links up with America in global politics, it's more than a debt from World War II -- other European countries have certainly considered accounts to be even for a long time now.

My opinions about the war in Iraq are pretty much in line with most people in both the USA and Great Britain -- it's bullocks and we shouldn't carry on with just a stupid adventure. But listening this chap speak brought it home: For decades now, it's always been the American boys (and now girls) and lads (and lasses) from the UK shoulder to shoulder, no matter what.

To alter the great Elvis Costello slightly, it's "the boys from the Mersey and Thames and Tyne" beside the kids from the Passaic and the Hudson and the Mississippi.

Beatles Notes

Just a couple of items:

The original contract between the Beatles and Brian Epstein has surfaced. You know, I grew up thinking of Epstein as some kind of older Svengali -- and then when the Rutles created Leggy Mountbatten, that image was solidified. Okay, he was older, but not much. He was only 33 when he died, after all. Still, I guess when they met George was what? 17?

I've been doing a little Beatles research lately and when I see the interviews with Epstein, he just looks like a nice guy who had a great idea. One interview, which I can't post here for legal reasons, has him prognosticating that pop music will focus on solo singers -- something that didn't really happen.

Anyway, he was gear.



And -- I won't add a lot of commentary here: Mark David Chapman has been denied parole for shooting an innocent man five times in the back (four bullets met their mark). The man he killed had been kind enough to sign an autograph for him earlier that same day, December 8, 1980.

Time Out Turns 40

Tomorrow marks 40 years since the launch of the original Time Out Magazine.

Of course, today you see editions all over the world ... proof of one more thing that London got right. Click here for the Guardian's tribute to some of the great covers that TO has had over the years.

It's 80's Cinema All Over again

Two things put me in mind of 1980's British cinema this weekend.
First, they did a profile of Hanif Kureishi in the New York Times Magazine. Kureishi is probably best known as the screenwriter who brought us My Beautiful Laundrette (1985). Actually the piece was a little bit of tease since it the headline seemed to promise a visit to London with the writer, whereas it was mostly a typical -- albeit well executed profile.

Much bigger news during the past couple of days, of course, is the John Edwards Affair. These sexual scandals put me in mind of the Profumo Affair and the film that made that incident even more famous, Scandal (1989). That Joanne Whaley sure was something, eh. Anyway, the difference between the scandals are vast -- Profumo was sharing a mistress with a Russian spy. Edwards's indiscretions were purely private and affected no one. Profumo ended up bringing down PM Harold Macmillan. I doubt Edwards will bring down anybody but himself (and our chances for having a kick-ass Attorney General).

Oi! Don't be a Gonoph, Wanker!

A friend and I struck up a conversation about British Jews a few weeks ago -- He's an American Jew who's family comes from Manchester. He told me that Jews had such an impact on Cockney life that Dickens even used the word "goniff" (Yiddish for thief) in his work.

I did a little research, and sure enough, there are lines like this one from Dickens's detective stories:

If the smallest 'Gonoph' about town were crouching at the bottom of a classic bath, Inspector Field would nose him with a finer scent than the ogre's ...

Indeed, several dictionaries, including the OED, have attributed the derivation to the Hebrew word "gannabh," which, in turn became the Yiddish word, goniff. Which, then, like "chutzpah" or "putz," made its way into English slang.

There's an alternate theory which tries to prove that the word came from some High German phrase -- Like English, Yiddish also happens to be derived from High German.

Anyway you slice it: All those 19th century Londoners speaking Yiddish. Fancy that.

It Ain't Cricket (that we don't understand cricket in the US)

I'm not going to pretend that I know anything about cricket.

I do know that I'm jealous that because we're one of the few English-speaking countries not in the Commonwealth (I guess having a bloody revolution sort of erased our chances at that) we get left out of some of these cool Commonwealth competitions.

One thing I do know is that one of those competitions is happening right now at South Africa is in the UK and doing very well.

Another thing I know is one of the stars on the SA team is a batsman (i.e. "batter") and bowler (rougly "pitcher") named Hashim Amla -- and that Amla is one of the grooviest looking cats in sports today. I mean can you imagine a guy who looks like that playing on any kind of American team?

Rarely do I feel a personal affinity toward sports personalities (although I wouldn't have minded hanging out with Keith Hernandez circa 1986). I know it's shallow because I'm only judging this on looks, but I just think Hashim and I could be friends.

Random News

Nipping in to bring you three "titbits":



Ronaldo (Christano Ronaldo ... not to be confused with the Brazilian one-named Football star) announced today that he will be staying with Manchester United.









David Tennent (Doctor Who #9) and Patrick Stewart (Captain Picard) are tearing up the boards in Stratford. Their Hamlet (the Doctor has the title role, Jean Luc is Claudius) is receiving excellent notices.















Noel Gallagher made news when he railed against the writers at the Guardian and the Observer: "It really pisses me off ... all these spotty herberts whose mams and dads voted for Margaret Thatcher all those years are now sitting on some moral fucking high chair."





Spotty herberts sitting on a moral high chair? I'll never learn this language.

Am I Bovvered?

Thanks to the Phonybrit community, I can share this nice radio interview Catherine Tate did on the BBC Women's Hour. Now, that's something I'm not likely to have found on my own.

Most Americans didn't know who Tate was when she suddenly appeared on Doctor Who, first on a Christmas special, and then as his regular companion. I admit I had never seen her work, but I had heard of her catchphrase, "Am I bothered?" (Catchphrases seem even more important on the British Isles, maybe because it's so easy for some bit of pop culture to run wild in a short amount of time.) The phrase comes from her famous character, Lauren, who seems like someone Ali G had a one-night stand with. (Don't tell "his Julie.")

What Doctor Who fans on this side of the pond weren't likely to know is that in addition to Donna Noble and Lauren, Tate is a cast of thousands in one person -- plus, I hear she's an hilarious standup comedian.

Now it makes sense: Those lingering shots in that first Doctor Who show, the startling music when she first appeared. This lady was already pretty famous. It would be the same thing if you didn't know who Whoppi Goldberg was and she suddenly appeared on Star Trek: Next Generation. You'd be like, "They're spending an awful lot of time with that bit character, the bartender."

In the UK, Tate is almost as well-known for the tour-de-force performance she put in with the then-current PM for Comic Relief. Just one viewing will show you how mad her comedy is. (BTW, the actor she mentions at the end was on EastEnders. I had to look it up.)

Another Fine Mess

It's all pretty complicated, but suffice it to say that the Prime Minster of Great Britain has got himself, to use an Americanism, up s**t's creek without a paddle.

It would take more space than we have here to explain what going on (not that I even fully understand what's going on). Apparently there are Blair holdovers in the cabinet either plotting to oust Gordon Brown (or not, depending on whom you believe), polls calling him the worst PM in 60 years (and that includes John Major!), a missive from Tony Blair lambasting Brownie's performance ...

It's amazing that just a year ago, Brown was getting excellent notices on his handling those dreadful floods last summer and the bus and train terror attacks -- but it just goes to show you, on either side of the Atlantic, it's the economy, stupid. Labour have to start listening to all of the fancy campaign experts they import from Washington.

In an interesting sidebar: it looks like the David Miliband is set to take over Labour, but there is a chance that one Harriet Harman could take over as well (both are seen in the beginning of the clip below). With Tsipi Livni possibly taking over Kadima in Israel and with Hillary Clinton coming so close to success here, there could have been a estrogen trifecta. Then again, if it wasn't for the tragedy in Pakistan, there may have been a female PM there too.

Back in Westminster: When was the moment the applecart tipped over? This session (see below) of Parliament, held at the end of 2007, could have been that very moment. Everyone loves Questions for the Prime Minister ... If you listen carefully, can you hear something cracking, just before Brownie answers that second question from the Tory leader, David Cameron?

Hang on a Mo'

SAgent00Soul alerts me to this mind blowing fact: Stephen Fry ... yes, Stephen Fry of Jeeves and Wooster ... is a Mac-head! So now, in addition to being half of the comedy team of Fry and Laurie (as in Hugh Laurie), and in addition to being a major presence one of my favourite TV shows of all time, Blackadder (which really deserves a posting of its own soon), Fry shares my enthusiasm for gadgets. Oh, and I also left him off the list of cool British Jews. Well, I left Peter Sellers off that list too, but I think you need to be alive to qualify.

Fry maintains a blog called Dork Talk. He claims to be the second-ever Mac owner in Europe and that he never met a smartphone he didn't like. Recently, he waxed rhapsodic about the 3rd Gen iPhone. Fry caused a minor kerfuffle when he criticised the BBC technology editors for not doing enough stories on Apple. In his reply, the head of the section started with a classic line: "I feel a little uneasy disagreeing with a national treasure ..."

Enjoy this minor row, and tuck into Fry's blog with abandon.

Second conclusion to this post: Look soon, dear readers, for love letters to Rowan Atkinson and Hugh Laurie. I especially owe Laurie one. Beside doing a great American accent, he has added to marital bliss here in the Phonybrit household: House is one of exactly two shows on telly that my wife and I agree on. The other one's Mad Men.

Hmmm ... Now I have three things in my life with no visible ties to the UK: the Boss, the Amazin's (as previously mentioned) -- and now Mad Men.